Wednesday, September 07, 2005
Regifting
Has it happened to you? Chances are it has; you might have known it, but then again you might not have. A girl in my office just received a set of glasses as an engagement gift that she's sure was regifted. This spawned our whole conversation about the issue, and about what's allowed and what isn't.
She's sure that the girl who gave the glasses to her only did because she had received them earlier and didn't like them enough to keep them. "After all, she just got married. She's bound to have tons of stuff to get rid of." That's fair enough. Even when registering, you'll always end up with a certain amount of godawful crap that is so shameful you wouldn't even visit it upon the poor. My sister-in-law received no less than four garishly painted chip and dip platters. Also this weird tapestry-style blanket with two bears all dressed up, and it was personalized. Lucky for her, two of the platters are seasonal, so she doesn't have to worry about having too many - a platter for every occcasion. Yay!
I've regifted. For decency's sake I've tried to keep it to liquor, 'cause no one minds getting booze. When I was a student I think I might've batted an eye if someone gave me a screw-top bottle of wine, but by the end of the night I would have chugged it straight from the bottle even if it had had a rat and a syringe in it.
Recently I broke my own rule and regifted a picture frame at a wedding shower. Question. Does it still count as regifting if the item in question was never actually given to me as a gift? My father won it at some sort of curling event and they would never have used it, so my mother suggested I take it to an approaching bridal shower. I rationalized the decision by reminding myself that the bride had some similar looking picture frames in her house and that I was paying a crapload to fly to Nova Scotia for the wedding. Besides, who wouldn't want a series of frames attached together like a carousel? It screams class. Or maybe it screamed "cheap ass." It was sort of hard to hear above the noise of the hen party.
I suspect that my uncle and aunt were the victims of regifting when they received a very odd cake topper. First of all, who buys someone a cake topper? Aside from one's wedding, when are you likely to need a cake topper? Hands? That's right, never. It sits on their hutch looking like an odd bit of sculpture you can't quite wrap your mind around, until you go a little closer and realize it is in fact two crystal swans kissing; their bodies sculpted in such a way so as to make them heart-shaped. Aw, how craptacular. They keep it around as a conversation piece and you can frequently hear party guests asking each other where Terry and Dianne put the statue of those "two fucking swans." They aren't named that just 'cause they hate them, either.
The rules for re-gifting should be simple and as follows:
Has it happened to you? Chances are it has; you might have known it, but then again you might not have. A girl in my office just received a set of glasses as an engagement gift that she's sure was regifted. This spawned our whole conversation about the issue, and about what's allowed and what isn't.
She's sure that the girl who gave the glasses to her only did because she had received them earlier and didn't like them enough to keep them. "After all, she just got married. She's bound to have tons of stuff to get rid of." That's fair enough. Even when registering, you'll always end up with a certain amount of godawful crap that is so shameful you wouldn't even visit it upon the poor. My sister-in-law received no less than four garishly painted chip and dip platters. Also this weird tapestry-style blanket with two bears all dressed up, and it was personalized. Lucky for her, two of the platters are seasonal, so she doesn't have to worry about having too many - a platter for every occcasion. Yay!
I've regifted. For decency's sake I've tried to keep it to liquor, 'cause no one minds getting booze. When I was a student I think I might've batted an eye if someone gave me a screw-top bottle of wine, but by the end of the night I would have chugged it straight from the bottle even if it had had a rat and a syringe in it.
Recently I broke my own rule and regifted a picture frame at a wedding shower. Question. Does it still count as regifting if the item in question was never actually given to me as a gift? My father won it at some sort of curling event and they would never have used it, so my mother suggested I take it to an approaching bridal shower. I rationalized the decision by reminding myself that the bride had some similar looking picture frames in her house and that I was paying a crapload to fly to Nova Scotia for the wedding. Besides, who wouldn't want a series of frames attached together like a carousel? It screams class. Or maybe it screamed "cheap ass." It was sort of hard to hear above the noise of the hen party.
I suspect that my uncle and aunt were the victims of regifting when they received a very odd cake topper. First of all, who buys someone a cake topper? Aside from one's wedding, when are you likely to need a cake topper? Hands? That's right, never. It sits on their hutch looking like an odd bit of sculpture you can't quite wrap your mind around, until you go a little closer and realize it is in fact two crystal swans kissing; their bodies sculpted in such a way so as to make them heart-shaped. Aw, how craptacular. They keep it around as a conversation piece and you can frequently hear party guests asking each other where Terry and Dianne put the statue of those "two fucking swans." They aren't named that just 'cause they hate them, either.
The rules for re-gifting should be simple and as follows:
- Don't give anyone anything you wouldn't give to the poor
- Don't give anyone anything you'd be too embarassed to have in a yard sale
- Don't give anyone used clothing as a major gift (if you're hanging out and you mention a sweater you have that doesn't fit, but you think might fit your girlfriend, fine, but if you wore it for a month, chunked out, and then wrap it for her birthday you are officially a shitbag)
- Don't give someone something you know they won't like just to multi-task (give the gift and get rid of something you hate). That's just mean-spirited
- Chocolates or candies still wrapped in cellophane are fine
- Used books are fine if they're rare, first editions, or antiques
- Students can give anyone anything they can afford, including used copies of the White Album (I don't want to talk about it, shut up)
- Don't just give someone something 'cause you think you have to. What I mean is, if you forgot about an occasion and need to get hold of something at the last minute, don't just grab a container of half-used paprika and say "well, at least I have something!" Just grow a set and apologize and promise something later on. Or take the person out and get them drunk.
- Getting people drunk counts as a gift
- Spending time with people is better than some half-assed, stupid gift
- Don't give people fucking crystal cake topper swans
- Only give home-made gifts if they dont' like they were made by a five year old
- Unless you're a five year old
- I've deviated from re-gifting into actual gifting
- It's my freaking blog, I'll do as I please, this is valuable information
So there you have it. Feel free to add anything I might have missed, as this list is anything but exhaustive. Plus, I love reader mail.
